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!Allah's Heaven!

Ok, so you chosed the right way. You followed my advices and believed in my words. Good. You are ready to go to Heaven.
My Heaven is a bit different from that one in the Bible (some kind of religious MacIntosh, for those who aren't aware of it). My heaven has women instead of assexuated angels, straight asphalted roads instead of clouds, and I have the best health insurance in the galaxy (even though you might be dead by then).

Look at that bird!
So you are about to die. Don't worry, it happens. Though it might be painful, in a few seconds you won't feel anything anymore. So, relax. This is the kind of moment that you will never live again.

Stairway to Heaven... where did I hear that before?
The next step is to find the stairway. The spiritual world is not very organized, so it may be hard to find. Only my followers have a pass and a special golden card. Everyone in this kind of limbo will promptly lead you to the right way. The Heaven gates are only closed on friday afternoons. After all, what kind of public service works on friday afternoons?

Ride it on!
Instead of slow waks on a cloudy and confuse place, we have free bikes to bring the spirits to the right places. The male spirits have this special vehicle.

Wooo, thank Me!
In my heaven, instead of boring angels singing and playing annoying instruments, we have lots of virtuous women from Mother Russia to entertain you!

Last, but not least
And, of course, we have beer. I forbid people to drink it, but only when they are alive.

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