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!ALLAH!

This is Allah, shouting from the mountain tops about His powers, His deeds, and your destiny! Behold, the power of the One is flowing! Someone call the holy plumper.
Not Mario, please, I sent him to hell already.

This is what your favorite Supreme Being's site features:

-Allah's advices
-Miracles
-Allah's heaven
-Hell - the place you go after flirting with my sister

Now enjoy your stay. Don't forget to leave your credit card number and password, I might need it for a new miracle or something.